What IF
by Clarissa-Chan
Summary: As Zero as your spokesman, and Scissor also... We'll see the results of 'WHAT IF...' someone met someone, or if someone was to be... Confusing?
1. Roll Light and Roll Casket!

Eii... Just some thoughts, heheh!  
  
Note: I do not own any of the Megaman's,  
I do not even own Capcom, so don't sue me if you see this, Capcom!  
( which is hardly going to happen, right...? *looks around with   
a worried look.* )  
  
.: ` :. ~ .: ` :.  
  
Area scene is a very look-alike of the Jerry Springer show comes into veiw, and a red like beams down (*Audience waving signs like 'Take me with you E.T'), and Zero shows up.  
  
Zero: " Heheh, dumped that stupid Lobster. Anyway, hello my fans! " *Peace sign.*  
Big cword of girls: " WE LOVE YOU. " *Squeals and waving of hands.*  
Zero: " I know, I know. " *sigh.* " It's hard being m-" Right then, another light pops up, and SCISSOR SCHAIMPER pops up. " Oh no... "  
Scissor Schamimper: " Hahahah! You thought you could get rid of me so easily, but I have fans out there, and I must save all the Lobsters! STOP EATING LOBSTERS! "  
Zero: *Goes outstage for a moment and picks up the closest person and starts strangling them.* " Why did I get stuck with Lobster face?! WHY?! "  
Make-up Person: " Because w-we don't h-ave to pay- agh... air...! " *choke.*  
Zero: " I better get paid double for this..." *Mumble, walks back onstage where Scissor is giving poses.*  
Scissor: " Hahahaha! Yes, the Lobsters shall stay in the Seas, instead of be-"  
Zero: " Can it, Lobster face. "  
Scissor: " What did you call me?! " *Face would probably go more red, if it wasn't already red.*  
Zero: " You heard me. "  
Scissor: " You'll pay deeply for that... "  
Zero: " Anyway, for our first Guests, is Chibi's Roll Light and Roll Casket...!"  
Geatz comes onstage dragging two cages with very disturbing giggling Roll's, wearing exactly the same, who were poking some parts of the cages.  
Geatz: " I think you should just wait for the cages to break, the way they've been re-"  
No need to wait, because then the Cages both broke within the places that the Roll's had been poking.  
Rolll's: *Just sit in the Cages ruins, acting all innocent.*  
Scissor: *Starts twitching.*  
Zero: " Eh, right. Would Roll Light put her hand up? "  
*Both Roll's put both hands up.*  
Zero: " Eh... "  
Scissor: *Coughs and stops twitching.* " You just don't know what you're doing. Ahem, will the real Roll Light please stand up.  
I repeat, will the real Roll Light please stand up. "  
Both Roll's stand up.  
Scissor: " We're going to have a problem here. " *Starts dancing and singing.*  
Zero: " I need a pay-rise. "  
Suddenly then, the doors up at the top of the Audience Seats break open, and Chill Penquin comes through them.  
Chill Penguin: " Ah ha ha ha ha! Free the Penguins! " *Starts freezing up the whole place.*  
Zero: " Gra! That's it! " *Starts to grab for his Sabre (It's always behind him, isn't it?), but remembers he had to leave it with that Security woman. " Uh-oh... "  
Chill: " HAHAHAHA! " *Starting to freeze the beginning of the Stage.*  
Zero: " No worrys! " *Points out his Buster, but then a Message pops up right in his face.*  
Message: " we are s0rry, but for reas0ns, ZERO, this has a VIRUS in it, because we don't want anyone to get HURT now, do we?"  
The message then goes, but probably doesn't matter, because when it had finished leaving the last four words, Everything had been totally frozen.  
. Commercials .  
  
.: ` :. ~ .: ` :.  
  
How did Chill Penguin find the place?  
Who is the Security woman?  
Who is the Make-Up person?  
Why am I putting down this...?  
.: Anime Sweatdrop. :.  
Oh well, have to wait for the place to un-freeze, I suppose... 


	2. When shall this ever end?

Second Chapter...  
  
Note: I still do not own Capcom, or any of it's characters from their games which may be popping up in this Fanfic.  
  
.: ` :. ~ .: ` :.  
  
With the whole place flooded with freezing water, Zero is standing very a very evil look on his face, while Scissor is tied down to a chair with rope.  
Scissor: " Undo these! "  
Zero: " Do them yourself, you idiot for a Lobster. "  
Scissor: " If you have somehting like that to say to me, say it in my face, you... you red dumb blondie! "  
Zero: Twitches slightly, then stands infront of Scissor. " You idiot for a Lobster! "  
Scissor: " I'm telling mommy off of you... " *Sniffle.*  
Zero: *mumble* " Anyway, where was we last time? Oh, yes! The Rolls'! "  
The two Rolls' had still been standing there, with their hands up still.  
Zero: " Right, so which one of you is the real Roll Light? No games, now... "  
Both Rolls'start jumping around screaming 'Me! Me!'  
Zero: *Starts getting very annoyed.* " Now, now, just tell Zero who is really R-agh! "  
While he was talking, the two Roll's had gotten behind Zero and started to climb on his hair and started pulling it.  
Zero: " STOP THAT! Brats, get off! Now! " *Starts running around in circles, but still the Rolls' held onto his hair, going 'Whee', and 'Yaaay!'  
Scissor: " Hahaha. Derserves you right, Zero. " *Watches Zero with a glee upon his face.*  
Just then, Data starts to dance on the stage, and then starts talking gibberish.  
Everyone: *face vault*  
One of the Roll's get off of Zero's hair, then go over to him and picks him up, huggling him.  
Zero: " Eh... Aha! My plan worked! Yes, it was my idea to ring Data up! "  
Crowd of girls: *squeal*  
Zero: " Right, now Roll, get off of my hair like a good Roll... "  
Roll L: " No! "  
Zero: " Off! OFF! "  
Roll L: " The only way you're getting me off, is to cut that hair off! "  
Roll C: " Time for your reveenge, Scissor! "  
Scissor:" Hahaha. " *Cuts the rope with his Scissor-hands, and then preceeds to walk over to Zero, banging his 'Scissors' together.  
Zero: " You wouldn't... "  
*Snip*  
Scissor: " HAHAHAHA! " *Holds up the part he cut Zero's hair off with Roll Light still on it, and shows it infront of Zero's face.*  
Zero: " M-my... hair... "  
Roll L: " Hair... " *Pulls it out of Scissor's grip, and runs over to Roll*  
Zero: " You shall p-pay for this...! " *Runs offstage*  
Scissor: " Thank you, girls. Now, where were we? Oh, yes. Now, let's get  
the show running. "  
Sits down in a comfy red chair, and trys to hold onto a pen, but snaps it in half.  
Scissor: " Eh, excuse me for a moment, people. " *Starts to walk offstage.*  
. Five minutes later .  
Zero comes back, in his hands his Sabre, but also another person was holding onto it, who looked like she wasn't about to let go off of it so easily.  
Zero: " Where is he?! "  
Rolls': " He went to get a new pen, Zeeerooo. "  
Zero: " Which way did he go?! "  
Of course it wouldn't be easy, because both of them each pointed to different offstage exits, saying 'That way!'  
Zero: " ! Oh, you two are useless!" *Goes towards the other one he didn't come from, the woman STILL trying to take the Sabre off of him.*  
Rolls': " Opps. " *Points towards the upstairs exit after Zero leaves and start giggling.*  
. Ten Minutes later .  
There was still no sign of Zero or Scissor, so just then, still holding onto Zero's hair each side, the Roll's got up and grabbed hold of the Microhpones, smiling happily.  
Roll L: " Hello everyone! "  
Roll C: " You lot will be waiting for a wooong time! "  
Roll L: " Yep, you wee, we wanghed all the computer wettings, waking the-"  
Roll C: " Outsage change evwery five minwints! "  
Camerperson: " Hmm... I'll just put it to Commercials..."  
. Commercials .  
  
.: ` :. ~ .: ` :.  
  
Heheh...!  
Will the Interveiw thing ever start?  
Will the other people ever get proper names?  
Will the Security woman let go off Zero's Sabre, and  
also get a name of her own...?  
Oh well, wait for next time. 


	3. The beginning of a tiring fight

Third Chapter...!  
*Starts giggling and blushing like a crazy young girl girl*  
Crew: " ... "  
  
. : . : . : . : .  
  
After a very long time of wandering around and such, Zero finds Scissor sitting in a chair, with a very frustrated look on his face.  
Zero: " Now I've found you! "  
Scissor: *Ignores him* " Ah... Hell it. " *Chucks the pen away.*  
Zero: *Storms right infront of Scissor* " You shall NEVER live to see tomorrow after what you did to my hair, Lobster face! "  
Scissor: " I think I will. "  
Zero: *Snarl* " What makes you think that? "  
Scissor: " Well, considering how the Security Woman is still holding onto your Sabre aswell, and how your Buster is STILL having side effects from that Virus, you obviously can't do nothing. "  
Zero: *Face vault.* " Gra. Anyway, what is her name? "  
Scissor: *Blank look* " Everyone just calls her Security Woman. "  
Zero: " Eh, who are the other people here? "  
Scissor: *Blank look.* " They're just called by their Jobs... "  
Security Woman: *Finally gets the Sabre out of Zero's grasp* " Would you two just start with the SHOW?! You know how much time you two take?! "  
Zero and Scissor: *Mumble, and get everything sorted out.*  
  
Five minutes later...  
  
Zero: " Okay, hear we have the two Roll's, when they're Chibi (small), of course. Now, Roll's, how do you think you two would get along, if you two were stuck in a House for two days? "  
Roll C and L: *Start talking really fast and making no sense, nodding and shaking their heads now and then.*  
Scissor: *Acts like he can understand what they're saying, nods now and then.*  
Zero: *Sweatdrop.* " Erm, is that good or bad, Scissor? "  
Scissor: " ... "  
Zero: " ...? "  
Scissor: " ...I have no idea. "  
Zero: " I hate you. "  
Scissor: *Starts sobbing.*  
Zero: " Well, anyway, because we have no judgement in what they are saying at all, we'll stick them in the House for two weeks and watch from the Cameras their progress! "  
Roll C: " I thought you said two d-"  
Suddenly, the big doors uptop open up, and two men come with straight jackets, and start strapping the Roll's in them, then whisk them away.  
Zero: " Atlast. "  
Scissor: *Still sobbing.*  
Zero: " ... Anyway, because you mixed about two show worths of WHAT IFS, we'll give you one now! "  
Audience: *Squeal and scream.*  
Zero: " Now, may we please have Megaman! " *Looks at the papers. Face vault.*  
Megaman walks from backstage and does a pose which starts ZERO's fangirl's screaming.  
Zero: *Grumble.* " Now, Megaman X. "  
Megaman X walks from backstage from the other side, and gives a blank look at Megaman, who does exactly the same.  
Zero: " ... Why did I have to do this? " *Sigh.* " Anyway, now... Megaman Voulnutt! "  
Everyone: *Waits.*  
Zero: " Eh... Megaman Voulnutt? "  
Suddenly then, a very frantic Megaman Voulnutt comes from backstage. " I'm late, I'm late! "  
Megaman: " What... "  
X: " The... "  
Megaman Voulnutt: *Notices the other two and screams,* " IMPOSTERS! "  
Megaman: " Who are YOU calling a imposter?! I'M the REAL Megaman, so you two are imposters with all your X and Voulnutt's! "  
X: " You're both fakes! I'm the REAL Megaman! I can get in so many fights with Reploids then you two, that I could make them a CEMETARY! "  
Megaman V: " Reploids...? Whatever, I could take down so many Reaverbots, you'll have to start swimming, because all the land is used up by destroyed Reaverbots! "  
Megaman & X: " ... "  
Megaman V: " You two didn't make any sense either, but you two are still imposters. "  
X: " Nu-uh! "  
Megaman: " Idiots! Both of you! "  
A big arguement goes on for a long while, then a fight starts.  
Zero: " Something tells me to stop them, but... "  
Scissor: " I know, even for a bad guy, I just can't take my eyes off of this. "  
Cameraperson: " Please, tell me why we hired these jerks... "  
  
. Commercial .  
  
. : . : . : . : . : . : .  
  
*Calmed down, but still blushing.*  
Okay... Next Chapter will have more...! 


	4. And the next

Um...  
  
. : . : . : . : .  
  
The Stage is now all cracked up, the air filled with the sounds of Busters, and the screams of the Audience, who somehow, are not getting hurt.  
Zero and Scissor: *Offstage somewhere.*  
Zero: " This is becoming insane. "  
Scissor: *Nod.*  
Zero: " Why didn't they get a virus to using their weapons?! "  
Security Woman: *Pops up.* " We'd thought that they'd act more... like themselves? "  
Zero: " ?! How did you get here so fast?! "  
Security Woman: " Elevator. "  
Scissor: " ...Where? "  
Security Woman: *Runs off.*  
Zero & Scissor: *Sweatdrop.*  
Zero: " ...Strange woman. "  
Scissor: " Shouldn't you sort this mess out? "  
Zero: " Fi-Wait, what about you? "  
Scissor: " It wouldn't matter either way, you'll be paying for the mess. "  
Zero: " Why am I paying for the mess?! "  
Scissor: " The only reason I haven't killed you yet, is because I'm getting paid triple the amount you're getting paid. "  
Zero: " You wish... " *Grumble.*  
Scissor: " I don't need to. "  
Zero: " You sure about that?! " *Really starting to get mad.*  
A big arguement starts out with those two, while the three Megaman's are still fighting.  
Megaman: *Jumps back and stands, pointing out his Buster* " Pow. "  
X: *Jumps back also and stands the opposite, pointing his Buster at Megaman. * " Pow. "  
Voulnutt: *Jumps so that he faces the big door up the stairs, and points his Buster as Megaman then to X* " Pow. "  
Megaman: *Points Buster at X.* " Pow. "  
X: * Points Buster at Voulnutt.* " Pow. "  
Voulnutt: *Points Buster at Megaman.* " Pow. "  
Megaman: *Swap.* " Pow. "  
X: *Swap.* " Pow. "  
Voulnutt: *Swap.* " Pow. "  
They keep this up for about five minutes, untill.  
X: *Points it to Voulnutt.* " Pow. "  
Voulnutt: *Points it Megman. Pow.* " P-! "  
Megaman: *Gets knocked unconcious.*  
X: " Eh... "  
Voulnutt: " Let's agree that this never happened. "  
X: " Agreed. "  
They then go whistling up the stairs to the 'Big Doors', then run out of them.  
Zero: " Ah, shut up you Big face idiotic two ti- Eh? It's gone quiet... "  
They both lookwd out onstage, to find Megaman just laying there unconcious.  
Zero: " ..?! What the! "  
???: " Out of the way! " *Suddenly a big rush of people in medical jackets and tramble all over Zero, place Megaman onto the stretcher, go racing back offstage, trambling Zero once more as they went.*  
Zero: x.x;  
Scissor: *Was sensible, had gotten out of the way.* " hahaha... "  
Zero: *Gets back off, dusts himself off. Grumbles and then walks onstage.* " Look at this place...! "  
Scissor: *Goes and sits on the only chair standing.* " Hahaha... "  
Zero: " What are you laughing at? " *Glares at Scissor.*  
Scissor: " You've forgotten about your hair... "  
Zero: " What about my hair? " *Puts his hands behind him and trys to reach for his long hair.* " It's per-! MY HAIR! " *Remembers that Scissor's had cut it off.*  
Scissor: " HAHAHA! "  
Zero: " NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO-" *Jumps onto Scissor's and starts beating him up.*  
Big fight.  
Cameraperson: " This is starting to get pathetic... "  
. Commercial . 


End file.
